by Jane Eaton Hamilton
This is what happened when your wife left you after 20 years: I hate you, I wish you were dead, I kept waiting for you to die, I wish I had never married you, I really really don’t like you, I’m not sorry in case you think I should be, I don’t care about your arm, So what? Come back here I said. You don’t need to go to Emerg. What would Emerg do that you haven’t already done? She’s only a friend for god’s sake. Don’t you think we should shake it up a little bit around here, have a modern marriage? You’re even beautiful angry. Other people are smarter than you are; other people have educations and good jobs and good incomes. I’m so sorry, let me massage it. This could be more interesting, this marriage. Do you remember when? Really, I am so glad to be with you. So so lucky, You have many talents, You make me laugh, You’re so wise, Thank you, thank you, thank you for loving me, I’m so sorry, I can’t believe I flew off the handle again, I’m sorry I scared you, You ought to despise me, I love you, I love you, I adore you, I love your mouth, I love you, I love you, I love how smart you are, I love you, I love you, I love your children, I love you, I’m so incredibly lucky to have found you, Oh god, fuck me, Please kiss me, You have no idea how much I’d like to get to know you better, Hey you.
Jane Eaton Hamilton is the author of 8 books and the two-time winner of the CBC Literary Award for fiction. She blogs at janeeatonhamilton.wordpress.com.
July 22, 2015
Photo by: Joseph Lazauskas